我承認我一直都沒好好的寫下我跟外星人相識的過程, 因為沒想過會寫部落格, 我也沒有很勤勞的把人生記錄在日記上, 加上離我們相識的那天也過了那麼多年, 所以現在要寫反而需要更多時間來回想和整理思緒!
我問過外星人當初為何決定跟我在一起 (昨晚我又再問了一次, 想看答案是不是還一樣), 那時的我還在做治療 (雖然化療已結束, 但當時仍然有其它治療) 頭髮也只比平頭長一點而已, 看起來就像個小男生, 我很納悶他怎麼會喜歡那時有癌症的我? 幸好, 他之前和昨晚的答案都一樣!
他覺得我就跟其他人一樣, 有權利也有足夠的資格去愛人與被愛! 重點是, 那時的他喜歡我, 何不給彼此一個機會呢!
我只能說, 當時隨著感覺走的我們根本沒想過會走到婚姻這一步! 對於我們一路走來所面對過的困難, 我問過他是否有後悔過當初的決定, 他說完全沒有過, 而我選擇相信.
當時, 都是24歲的我們是在台北認識的. 外星人被他法國的公司派到台灣工作, 他在台灣生活了一年後, 某天晚上, 我們因緣際會的在某個露天酒吧相遇, 從此就結下冤家之緣!
........... 不 好 笑!! (走人中~)
ㄟ! 回來阿~ 我還沒寫完耶! 別走~~~
呵呵呵~ 今天內心戲比較多, 請多多包涵!
我們相遇的那晚剛好是我讓自己從恐懼和擔憂中"自我解放"的那一晚 (那時我的免疫力還不是很好, 我幾乎很少去公共場合, 更別說去有二手菸的酒吧)! 當時我的一位法國朋友河馬 (代名) 跟我提起了某個酒吧有個歡送聚會, 是露天的, 所以不用擔心在密閉空間被二手菸殘害的情況 (露天場所只是殘害的程度較少一點而已), 而被悶壞的我也只有考慮一下就答應了!
我們總共有四個人一起去, 一走進酒吧裡就看到一堆都是外國人的臉孔, 而大部分都是法國人 (那歡送會真的很多人!). 外星人當時站在靠近門口的地方跟著一群人聊天, 他注意到我們走進門, 也大方的朝我們方向走來 (他是唯一先走過來打招呼的人). 我們開始聊天, 河馬提到我會講幾個法文的髒話 (河馬教我的), 外星人問我有那幾個, 我也毫不客氣的一一說給他聽, 逗得大家嘻嘻哈哈大笑好幾聲! 之後他還有跟我們坐下來聊天, 但因當時身體較容易累, 所以我跟我朋友們也離開得早!
我對外星人的第一印象很好, 覺得他外表不錯, 笑容可愛, 很友善也平易近人. 一個禮拜後, 我跟河馬提起三個人一起吃飯的提議 (河馬當時跟外星人是同事)! 外星人問河馬是誰要一起吃飯, 河馬說 : "說髒話的那一位!"
河馬, 外星人和我三人一起去鼎泰豐吃晚餐, 大家聊得很開心, 而我們對彼此印象又更加深. 過幾天我跟河馬要了外星人的電話, 我也主動打給他. 外星人很訝異我會單獨約他. 直到那一天, 他心裡認為我是同性戀的疑慮才終於解開!
我們第一次單獨見面就從晚上九點聊到凌晨五點, 大部分都是我在講話 (他那時英文不太好)! 剛開始聊天時, 我就跟他坦白自己的情況, 問他介意跟一位有癌症的人交往嗎? 他毫無猶豫的說: "為何會介意? 我當然願意和你交往!" 我聽了當然很感動, 他沒有用異樣或過於同情的眼光看我, 對我來說, 那就是個大加分!
我們聊到快天亮, 但又不想就此結束, 所以他提議我們去景美爬山 (對於有一陣子都沒熬過夜的人來說, 我實在很不解為何我當時還那麼有精神! 或許那就是多巴胺的力量吧)! 我們真的去了仙跡岩走步道! 在健行途中也被很多早上去運動的人們投以異樣眼光. 對於一個金髮白皮膚的外國人跟一個不男不女的哈比人走在一起的景像, 我想也很難不多看一眼吧! 當時真的是太久沒做需要肺活量的運動了, 在爬的途中還真的是快喘不過氣, 結果我們還是爬到了山頂. 可惜的是, 當時霧很大, 沒看到遠山近水的景色就下山了!
蛤? 故事還沒完?? 吼! 怎麼寫那麼多阿! 廢話少說, 寫快一點!
好啦! 好啦! 再給我五分鐘! 乖~~~
話說我們是在他來台灣一年後才認識的, 但事實上, 我們在他第一天到台灣時就相遇過了 (這也是我們後來交往快一年後才發現的事)!
外星人說, 在他抵達台灣的第一天, 他公司的經理去機場接他們 (他和其它同行的法國職員). 一離開機場, 第一個去的地方就是我當時工作的西餐廳 (餐廳兼酒吧), 而我就是他們那桌的服務生 (我那時還未被診斷出血癌). 因為他經理是餐廳常客, 我很自然的跟他經理打招呼和聊天, 外星人立刻覺得我有著讓他無法忽視的存在感!
至於我的感覺... 我只能說, 服務業做久了, 常常人來人往, 除非是常客, 不然我很少會花心思記陌生臉孔, 所以我對他完全沒印象! 而對一切事物都還處於很新奇的心情之下的他, 當時他眼前的漂亮亞洲女人有著流利的英文能力以及充滿自信的態度, 所以我當下給了他深刻的印象! 他內心想著: 如果她是我的女朋友就好了! (漂亮是他講的, 我可沒說! 雖然他講的一切都有點唬爛之意, 但了解他不是唬爛的人, 所以我相信他當初真的是這樣想)
在我們交往一陣子後, 我回西餐廳兼職, 因為老闆在我生病期間還是持續付我薪水. 我感到感激和虧欠, 所以就算當時體力容易虛弱也還是想以勞力來報恩! 有一次在我上班時間, 外星人跟朋友來餐廳吃飯, 他看到了我跟客人互動的情形之後, 才讓他猛然回想起第一天到台灣的感覺. 他也因此確定, 我跟當時的"她"就是同一個人! (當他告訴我那事實後, 我還蠻震驚的! 那一刻真的會納悶, 我跟他究竟是天注定還是只是巧合? 我想這答案應該是無解)
說實在的, 我在人生最醜最低潮的階段認識了他, 他也不顧一切的喜歡了我, 從那一點我看到了他的難得可貴! 如果當初我沒主動打給他, 如果當初我們兩個都沒有勇氣踏出第一步, 現在也就不會有小惡魔和外星人的故事了.
如果你喜歡這一篇文章, 就不要吝嗇的給它推下去! 因為我想跟大家分享, 想告訴大家 - 外表不是一切! 還有, 幸福是可以自己主動爭取的! 不要因為是女人就被動的希望對方做到某種程度的追求才答應交往, 人生與愛情很難去預知, 說不定你的第一步就是你一輩子的幸福!
P.S. 我們在一起後, 他跟我說因為那些髒話, 他對我的印象很深刻, 覺得我很有趣, 也很欣賞我言語中的自信. 不過, 因為當時我頭髮很短 (他以為我頭髮短是因為我喜歡那樣的風格...), 跟我一起來的朋友裡也有一位頭髮短的外國女生 (她的名字是梅根, 以後會提到她, 因為她也是位對我很重要的人), 加上我跟她兩人常一起行動, 所以他以為我是同性戀... 直到我主動打電話給他後, 他才確定我不是! 這就是為什麼他以為我喜歡女人的原因!
I admit that I didn’t really sit my ass down and write about the story of how Alien and I met. I guess that I was just too lazy to do so. The good thing about having a blog is that I can force myself to write regularly. However, it has been years since we met, therefore, I need more time to think back and put my thoughts together!
Few years ago, I asked Alien why he decided to be with me in the first place (I actually asked him again last night to make sure that his answers match one and another). I was still undergoing two different treatments when we met (chemo had ended), and the length of my hair was like an army boy’s hair. I wondered how he would like someone like me, who then had cancer. Fortunately, his answers were both exactly the same! He thought that I have the same right like everyone else, who is worth to love and to be loved (He still thinks that). And the point is, he liked me, that’s what mattered to him the most!
Honestly, we didn’t think about the future at all, let along marriage and kids. We were just following our feelings and the passion we had for each other. As for the difficulties that we've faced at our first few years, I asked if he had ever regretted being with me, he said, “not at all and never will!” I choose to believe him.
Anyway, we won’t know the truth until we die.
Here is the story.
He was sent to work in Taiwan by the French company he worked for at the time. We met at an open-air bar in Taipei after he had been living in Taiwan for a year, and we were both 24 years old.
“HAHAHAHAHA~ I am just kidding!”
"…… It’s not funny!"
"OK ! OK ! Whatever!"
Please excuse my playful mood, it just happened... hehe~
Anyway, back to the story!
On the night we met, it was actually a “self-liberation” from my own fear and worries (I rarely went out in public at the time. My immunity was still weak; I didn’t dare to do anything that would damage my health, let alone go to places like bars with second-hand smoke!). A French friend of mine, Hippo (a code name), told me about a farewell party at an open-air bar, so I wouldn’t need to worry about the issue of second-hand smoke (It’s only a bit better than an indoor bar). It didn’t take me long to say, “ok, let’s go!”
There were four of us; we arrived at the bar and there were foreigners (Non-Taiwanese) everywhere, and they were French mostly (There were a lot of people!). Alien was talking to a group of people near the entrance; he walked towards us and greeted us when he noticed our arrival (he was the first one who came over to say hi). All of us started to chat; Hippo mentioned that I know a few dirty words in French (Hippo taught me those words). “How many do you know?” Alien asked. I unceremoniously told him what I knew, and everyone laughed hard and loud afterwards! We all sat down and talked a bit more, but I got tired easily, so my friends and I left quite early.
I thought of Alien as someone nice, good looking, cute smile, kind and easy-going after that night. He gave me a good first impression. A week later, I mentioned to Hippo that three of us should have a dinner together (Hippo was Alien’s colleague). Alien asked Hippo, “Who wants to have dinner?” Hippo said, “The one who swore.” Alien said ok right away!
Three of us went out to eat, and again, we had a nice chat. We got to know each other a bit more. Few days later, I asked Alien’s cell number from Hippo, and I took the initiative to call him. He was surprised that I called and asked to meet up just the two of us. From that day on, his doubt about me as a lesbian was finally solved!
We talked from 9 pm to 5 am at a tea shop on our first night out, and I did most of the talking (his English wasn’t good at the time)! I told him about leukemia at the beginning of our conversation. I asked if he was bothered by it.
“Would you mind to go out with someone who has cancer?” I asked him at some point.
“Why would I mind? Of course I would go out with you!”
Honestly, I was touched by his attitude. There was no hesitation! He didn’t look at me oddly and wasn’t being over-sympathetic, either. For me, that’s a big bonus point!
It was almost morning, but we didn’t feel like to end the night, so he suggested that we go have a small hike in the mountain (Altitude: 144 meters). For someone who didn’t stay up late for months, I had no idea why I was able to stay up all night and still had energy to go hiking! Maybe that’s what we called “the power of dopamine!
Anyway, we went for a hike. We did get some curious and strange looks from people who went hiking as well. It’s normal, I guess. Imagine a blond hair white guy walking with a boyish-looking hobbit…Well, you don’t see that very often in Taiwan.
As I was totally unfit at the time, so I had trouble to breathe during the hike, but nevertheless, we made it to the top! Unfortunately, the fog was too thick to see the city view, so we didn’t stay long.
And, that was how we met... or so we thought!
I was shocked when he told me about our "real first" encounter, because I had no impression at all. I was just doing my job...
In fact, we had already met on the first day of his arrival in Taiwan. His then manager Mr. B, went to pick them up at the airport (Alien and other French people). Mr.B took them to the pub that he went usually right after, and it happened to be where I used to work (before leukemia). Mr. B was a regular customer; I greeted him and chatted casually for a bit. Alien then noticed I have a presence that he couldn’t ignore! As for me, he was just another customer that I probably wouldn't meet again for the rest of my life.
For him, everything was still new and unfamiliar in a different country, and it was completely strange for him to see a beautiful Asian woman in front of him who speaks fluent English with a confident attitude, that immediately impressed him deeply! He thought to himself, “It would be nice to have a girlfriend like her!”
For me, it sounded unreal when he told me what he had in mind at that moment, but he swore they were all truth, and I know that he isn’t someone who lies about things like that. There was no need anyway; we were already together for almost a year when he found out about our "real first" encounter. Was it a "coincidence" or "meant to be"? I wondered. But, I guess we won't know the answer to that!
I went back to work at the pub eight months after we had been together. My former boss had continued to pay me every month since I was diagnosed with leukemia (until I went back to work for few months and quit the job completely afterwards). I was (still am) so grateful to him and I felt that I owed him a lot. Therefore, I wanted to repay his kindness with labor work even though I was still unfit at the time.
Once, Alien came to the pub to eat with his friends while I was working; he noticed that there was a familiar feeling when he saw me interacting with the customers. It suddenly reminded him of his first day in Taiwan. Since then, he was sure that I am the same woman who he admired then!
To be honest, I met him when I was in the most hopeless and ugliest phase of my life, and he chose to like me despite all the odds… I knew then, he was a keeper!
The thing is, if I hadn't made the first move; if both of us didn’t have the courage to take our first steps to give it a try, there would be no story about an Alien and a little evil (That would be a shame! ). What I truly want to say is that life and love are difficult to predict, you will never know, maybe your first step will be your lifetime of happiness!
P.S. Few months after we got together, he told me that he was deeply impressed by my confidence when we met at the bar. He remembered me as someone interesting, funny and good at swearing. However, my hair was very short (At first, he thought my hair style was just a style I liked), and there was a female friend of mine at the bar who also had short hair, and she and I seemed very close. Therefore, he thought I was a lesbian... until I called him! There you go! This is the reason why he thought I like women!